#ImpactNOTLive Just got in the door and I hear Hogan saying that he wants to be Eric Young when he grows up. Least EY has dignity.

#ImpactNOTLive Awesome, TNA’s really re-doing the Turkey Suit match. Only thing missing is referee Rudy Charles

#ImpactNOTLive Anybody have a recap to catch me up to speed? Other than Hogan, I saw Angle making out with Wes Briscoe when he won his match

#ImpactNOTLive Aces8s having a feast backstage, throw a dart, & the cameraman doesn’t bother to show where it landed. Cameraguy’s in on it!

#ImpactNOTLive York has the cojones to call out Jeff Hardy. If Bischoff & Pritchard weren’t doing blow off of Hardy, I’d say York has a shot

#ImpactNOTLive Hard to tell from my vantage point, but it looked like York dropkicked Hardy so hard, knocked one of his holey arm socks off.

#ImpactNOTLive *Full Nelson Suplex* | Taz: “I haven’t seen that before. Haven’t seen anybody do that in awhile” | Well which is it?

#ImpactNOTLive Tenay: “Here’s a guy who was so close to making it, ECW, WWE, and even WCW back in the day”

#ImpactNOTLive Todd: “York almost with the Mood Swing” | Taz: “Mood swing, which one?” | Todd: “The Swinging Neckbreaker he used weeks ago”

#ImpactNOTLive TODD KENELEY OWNING TAZ WITH FACTS > EVERYTHING. Todd 1 Taz 0

#ImpactNOTLive Oh look Jeff Hardy and his shitty Ultimate Warrior face paint, pick up the win. #TNAwful #FuckThisCompany

#ImpactNOTLive Hardy celebrates, congratulates York, poses on the rope AND DOESN’T EVEN HEAR ROODE TAKING OUT YORK. #TNAwful

#ImpactNOTLive There’s been way too many close ups of Jeff Hardy with him making orgasmic-like sounds.

#ImpactNOTLive Roode poses with the title and then spits in the camera while saying Final Resssssssssolution. Say it don’t spray it Bobby

#ImpactNOTLive Brooke H: “Tay, you’re the only female Gut Check winner, that says a lot” | SAYS YOU DON’T SCOUT KOS CAUSE PRITCHARD HATES EM

#ImpactNOTLive Taeler Hendrix is coming out to what sounds like a Lou Bega demo track.

#ImpactNOTLive Taz: “Taeler Hendrix the fiery redhead…pass the stuffing”

#ImpactNOTLive Taeler picks Tara, Taz: “What the hell is going on tonight!?” | I dunno, it’s almost as if it’s an open…#NOCONTINUITYNIGHT!

RT @Chux4w – Brooke: “You’re the only female Gut Check winner. That says a lot.” – It says there’s only been one female Gut Check. #Impact

RT @TableOfJapan – THEY GAVE @Taeler_Hendrix JENNA MORASCA’S OLD THEME. HAH! #ALLCAPS #ImpactLive

#ImpactNOTLive As Tara came out, Taz said something about having cranberry sauce in catering that wasn’t cranberry sauce nor catering. Uhhh

#ImpactNOTLive Todd: “A little smooch there” | Taz: “Yeah a little snot knock” | Why’s Taz is being horribly disgusting? #NOCONTINUITYNIGHT!

#ImpactNOTLive Shaun White with chicanery tries to get Tara to run into Pectacular, high kicks Tara, and bends back to view Taryn’s cleavage

#ImpactNOTLive Despite that, Tara nails the Widow’s Peak and gets the win. IT’S LIKE BOTH #NOCONTINUITYNIGHT AND #GUTCHECK AS ONE SHOW!

#ImpactNOTLive By a fucking lightyear. RT @Andy_Salcedo: @5CornersxSmootx Tazz calling WWE >Taz calling TNA.

RT @Andy_Salcedo@5CornersxSmootx is anyone in Taz’s ear, because if there is, they need to be fired.

#ImpactNOTLive Turkey Suit match next. Loser gets to be my next icon for awhile…AS #NOCONTINUITYNIGHT CONTINUES

#ImpactNOTLive WOW. JESSE PECTACULAR’S DIXIETRON IS A HORRIBLY KNOCKOFF OF THE TMZ VIDEO BUMPER.

#ImpactNOTLive Taz: “I’d like to forget about last year” | I’d like to forget about you tonight.

#ImpactNOTLive Todd: “Are there any disqualifications in a Turkey Suit match?” | Taz: “Well uh, sometimes there’s uh…” | #TNAwful

#ImpactNOTLive *Tara and ODB rolling over on Stiffler” Todd: “There’s referee Stiffler getting rolled up” | Taz: “Livin up to his name!”

#ImpactNOTLive Todd: “Turkey’s got some big wings” | Taz: “He’s got a Tickle Me Elmo thing goin on right now” | THAT’S NOT PG!

#ImpactNOTLive EY wins, and Jesse Pectacular wears the Turkey Suit and will be my icon ASAP. Shame @RudyTheRef didn’t call this match.

#ImpactNOTLive Aces8s enter the ring after the match, announcers underplay them, and take out EY. Let’s hope they Ka-Bosh him smart again.

#ImpactNOTLive Aces8s target the knee and ankle of Eric Young, EY’s “AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!” 2nd top highlight of the show tonight.

#ImpactNOTLive Claire Lynch + Pope talking casket RT @TNACreative: Trying to figure out how to reenact the Katie Vick angle. Suggestions?

RT @Chux4w – Why is everyone getting blown up coming down to the ring? #Impact

#ImpactNOTLive Kaz vs Styles, to see who’s the better man…THIS time around. #NOCONTINUITYNIGHT

#ImpactNOTLive That springboard DDT from Kaz onto AJ coming into the ring, was pretty nice!

#ImpactNOTLive AJ with a Pele kick off of Hebner shoving Kaz, gets the win. Despite it being phoned in for the holiday, pretty good match

#ImpactNOTLive Aries: “The person I’m going to call out is going to open Pandora’s Box” | Hemme? | Aries: “And that box isn’t pretty” | ODB?

#ImpactNOTLive Aries: “There’s only one name that’s keep me back. One name that’s holding me down” | Vince McMahon

#ImpactNOTLive LOLOLOLOL Aries just insulted Brooke Hogan LIKE A FUCKIN BOSS!

#ImpactNOTLive Aries: “You know what you are? You’re a HOGAN!…I’m sick & tired of the name HOGAN” | They recycled Madison’s promo to this

#ImpactNOTLive Aries: “Maybe you’d be Ms. Brooke Trump, maybe you’d be Ms. Brooke McMahon” | Don’t think Shane’s into Sandusky stuff.

#ImpactNOTLive Really gotta give TNA props here, they’re ACTUALLY addressing the “4th wall” footage that we see.

#ImpactNOTLive Aries shows footage of Bully Ray canoodling with Brooke, Hulk comes out and is most likely going to file a lawsuit against AA

#ImpactNOTLive *ARIES I DUNNO FACE*

#ImpactNOTLive Tune in next week on Hogan (Doesn’t) Know Best! #NoContinuityNight

RT @Rhiannamator – I am SOOOOOO sick of pro wrestling who-slept-with-who “scandals.”

—RECAPPING FOR BEING LATE DUE TO THANKSGIVING BALL GAME—

#ImpactNOTLive Going through old tweets from tonight, let’s see what I missed in the first 30 minutes

Okay so I didn’t miss much apparently. RT @chux4w: Wow. Wes Brisco v Garett Bischoff. This is…this. #ImpactNOTLive

RT @chux4w – To be fair, we haven’t seen Brisco yet and if his dad has had a hand in his training I’m sure he’ll be solid. Garett though… #Impact

Will check the tape! RT @chux4w: Calling it now: Brisco’s shoulders were also down. #ImpactNOTLive

0. RT @chux4w: Really? None of the gut check guys have won their match? Don’t remember, but surely one of them must have. #ImpactNOTLive

RT @Chux4w – Angle “put his neck out” for Brisco. That’s quite a statement given the state of his neck. #Impact

Uhh. RT @chux4w: Joey Ryan says he’s calling Chavo Guerrero out because he has a giant penis. Make sense of that if you can. #ImpactNOTLive

RT @Chux4w – Shaw appears to be blown up after his entrance. Bad start. #Impact

RT @Chux4w – Tenay tries to plug TNA’s appeal for the Sandy victims, Taz jumps in as quickly as possible to get back to the match. #Impact

RT @TNACreative – Shaw looks like he dressed in stuff @JohnCena rejected. #OpenFightNight #ImpactTonight #ImpactLive #IMPACTWRESTLING

RT @TableOfJapan – Just turned #LiveImpact on. Is that Alex Silva or Justin Gabriel?

RT @Chux4w – Hogan: “You’re the turkey alright. Is this the drumstick?” / ODB: “Here’s a couple of breasts.” – Wehey! #Impact

#ImpactNOTLive Shouts: @Resslerblog @JoelxDRRomantic @Ozclc @Figure4HedgeHog @chux4w @TNABooking @TNACreative

#ImpactNOTLive @Diamondelle84 @Andy_Salcedo @ZackZiggler @shanrcarter72 @twiztidskull @RachelnHarley @theeangelf

#ImpactNOTLive @PuoNayda @OniRokaku @GStavrakas @XLovenPipebombX

Special thanks to @rudytheref @JosephPark_Esq & @RobbieEImpact. Even though I’m critical on the product, you guys are great sports

#ImpactNOTLive That’s it for me. If you didn’t put up with southern racist assholes, your Thanksgiving was better than mine. Good night!

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